The only way I can express this is through words, I'm alone right now.. I have nothing but my computer to vent my emotions onto at this time.

The world is collapsing on me and I can't take it anymore, death has caused me more pain than anything else and even then my problems seem to pile up. Endless tears flow as my angry fist punches walls out of frustration. This pain is something I can't seem to handle, I find myself wanting to resort to past methods to calm myself. I'm desperately fighting myself to hold back urges, my body doesn't need this, but I do. Constant stirring and bitching has left me in a mess and I've only really got 2 friends I can confide in, I hardly even trust myself anymore. There's nothing left to fill the gap thats now opened, I feel lonely all the time. I've split into two people and I can't control my actions anymore, I'm so confused.